His love was fixed but unsought
By the ostentation of Eros’s Play,
The casual making-love façade
With no precondition of the soul;
But that which it consummates
Is a union of the two existences
Of Body and Soul, the sovereign
Surrender of the self to the beloved
Becoming a whole, an ensemble
metastasizing “I” lovingly, willingly
Directed toward “Thou” entirely
In trust of one another wholeheartedly
making him of her and her of him magically.
P.S.: A short essay called “A Courtship of Twenty Years” by John Stuart Mill (1806-73) reveals his infatuation with his friend’s wife, who eventually became his wife. It’s a rhapsody of his admiration of everything about her, her moral character, intellectual gifts, and graceful beauty. This secret affair of the heart is not, however, tinged with a lascivious desire for his friend’s wife thanks to his elucidation of her virtues that benefited him to become wiser and more wholesome; his love for her is a sublimation of the ego, which was capable of integrating the sexuality of the id into the personality. Nowadays reductionism is responsible for interpreting love as a mere sublimation of sex and conscience merely in terms of the superego. But love is the precondition of sex, not the result of the sublimation thereof. What might have been his physical attraction to her at the inception of his love affair was elevated to the actuality of Love, the wholeness of Eros (Body) and Psyche (Soul), which is the essence of love between the lovers.
A Cat in the Mirror 