On a wide uncharted sea,
One boat sails hither and another sails thither
In the company of the selfsame winds.
It’s the will of the sailer
Not the forces of the winds
That decides a way.
Like the winds of the sea,
So are the ways of destiny.
It’s the decision of your soul
That leads you to the goal
Of life full of meanings.
Here I am at the end of the first day of a new week. Upon just returning from working on the evening shift at school in the City, I should go to bed instead of writing this post to rest my weary soul coping with daily rituals of emotional ebbs and flows. Yet this is the best time of me to purge out all my angst, fears, and insecurities I am possessed by; the best time because I can walk out of all my daily duties as an administrative assistant at work, as an eldest daughter of my parents at home, and any other status as a functional member of society. This is my time, mine, and mine only to express myself freely without supervision. So here I am, writing.
I like writing: Poetry, essay, letter, email, and notes – in English. Since English is not a primary language I did not pick up from the infancy to the adolescence, I still have to work hard thereon to make my writing perspicuous for telling the world what I mean to say. The grammar may not seem flawless in my writing, but I have got ideas that few can think of. No, this is not a pretentious glib, nor is this a simulation of writer’s confidence in the English language. Yes, I’ve got it for sure.
I have recently bought Stephen King’s On Writing from Amazon.com, and this is a magnificent book! I had never enjoyed any book by American writers until I found this book! It’s a bit hasty to talk about my review of the book at this point because I am still reading it, but King is truly original and ingenious in divulging his biographic tales of how he came to write in his childhood; of how he overcame his dypsomania and drug addiction; and of how he arrived as a successful writer in order to help us write well. I shall return to the subject of his book and the review thereof in another posting later, but the most vivid advice from King registered in my mind is that it is not how many vocabularies I know but how well I use the vocabularies that I have already acquired. This is truly an Eureka moment. King’s advice is worth a million. And this has become my axiom for writing since this day.
And I will not be afraid of writing in English any longer in fear of receiving criticism on some grammatical errors because the purpose of my writing is to tell stories, to entertain ideas/feelings that people can connect with, not to wow English teachers/professors/grammarians/conservatives who may disparage a foreigner’s (especially of East Asian ethnicity) English writing skills.
Thus wrote Stephanie S. I write, therefore I am.
The year’s at the winter,
And the time’s at night;
Night’s at eleven;
The street’s emptied;
The moon’s on the sky higher;
The puppy’s in delight;
This day’s driven,
Equanimity’s welcomed.
Saturday, December 5th, 2015
This sounds rather anachronistic. But I cannot help but think that a man should be attentive and courteous to a woman whether she is beautiful or not. Sounds discriminating in the era of politically correct gender equality? But does this societal change have to eradicate such civilized decorum and care for a human being?
Chivalry is considered as a thing of the past, especially of the medieval time, when gentlemen and knights showed their courtesy to ladies, attended to female desires with self-sacrifice if their own interests came in conflict with those of the fair sex. Pretty impressive and manly. I like it that way.
It is not some kind of grand gesture that I consider chivalry. It is a simple but considerate behavior/attitude demonstrated by men to show care for anyone in need. For instance, giving up his seat on the bus to a woman or elderly person standing, opening an entrance door in a store for a a person behind him, and/or helping a needful person in sight are what makes of this code of conduct.
Maybe I am daydreaming or pathetically naive to believe that a chivalrous conduct resulted from such motive as aforesaid. Or maybe my sentimentality is of antiquity, and I am not progressive enough to defy all those male chauvinistic attitudes toward the members of my own sex. However, no matter how you will think about my favorable opinion on male chivalrous gestures toward the opposite sex or anyone who needs help in daily lives, my creed for the ideal masculinity in the form of gentlemanly attitude toward women of all kind will remain true-blue. And that is why I remain a maiden until I see such fine man of magnanimity.
Wit is chicken soup for your soul, making you feel warm, cheerful, and thoughtful. And the quality of wit is based upon its simplicity -no elaborate belle lettres, grandiloquent expressions required. That said, Mr. Atkinson’s works are intelligent, amusing, and attractive.
Source: grammatical voice
Some people who are academically brilliant or well-read are gauche in social interactions. And this betrays our general presumption that cognitive intellectual ability (“IQ”) corresponds to social skills that are essential to achieve success in career and/or relationships. It simply isn’t the case, unfortunately. IQ and EQ are two separate entities that work differently. I will tell you the epitome of what EQ is.
Emotional Intelligence or Emotional Quotient (“EQ”) is a faculty of recognizing, comprehending, and making decisions on how we think, feel, and act. It plays a vital role in shaping our interactions with others as well as our understanding of ourselves. EQ defines (1) how and what we learn; (2) allows us to set priorities; and (3) determines the majority of our daily actions. In fact, research hints us that the higher EQ is, the more successful one becomes.
In Emotional Intelligence: 30 Days to Higher Emotional Intelligence by Bob Smart (what a great perspicuous name it is!), the study of EQ can be traced back to the work of Charles Darwin who postulated that EQ was critical for survival. So the study of EQ has already been in progress, which asserts that it is not some fad theory to be regarded lightly.
Basically, what you need to improve your EQ is self-control and self-confidence. Smart in the book avers that it is vital that we should have solid self-confidence to guard ourselves against any disastrous social relationships that will lead us to our own unhappy ending in life. So in order not to be subject to such miserable consequences, the author advises us that we should be our own governors of our acts, not the subject of the act done by others.
To illustrate, we should say something like the following:
Do you get it? Instead of someone makes me feel the above-mentioned, it is “I” who feel that way. True that it was someone who made you feel negative, but it is you who are responsible for all the things that might happen next. That is, it you take “conscientious” ownership of your feelings and emotions, you will find yourself left with options to choose all of sudden. It will be YOU who will be the one in control and not at the mercy of OTHERS. This change of thinking will empower you to control your emotions and feelings, so that you will know what to say or do next to your own advantage. Thus your enslavement to others acts will be obviated. You are Sui Juris of your own feelings, emotions, and actions. Indeed so.
It is a simple but challenging thing to change your mode of thinking that has been conditioned until now. But at least, you can try it. Just give it a go for just 30 days or even longer with consistency, and see how it works. It may not be changed overnight for sure, just as Rome wasn’t built for a day. Nevertheless, I will be an Olympic torch carrier for this mind game because I myself need to revitalize my mind and spirit in development of EQ for betterment. Does anyone want to join me?
You must be logged in to post a comment.